Are you trying to be the perfect mum?

Many women, who are trying to juggle a career – whether employed or self-employed – while also trying to raise a family, keep a neat and tidy home, cook perfectly balanced nutritious meals AND be the perfect partner can probably relate to feeling utterly exhausted, not to mention a failure at never achieving quite 100%.

So it might come as welcome relief that new research shows our striving to be perfect could be ruining our life.

The research, as reported in the carried out by Dr. Brene Brown a professor at the University of Houston, found that 63 per cent of women and 67 per cent of working mums suffer from stress, compared to just 51 per cent of men.


Her research found that people who settled for “imperfection” and settled for less, lead more inspiring fulfilling lives.

She explains the damaging effects of this relentless pursuit of perfection:

“Perfectionism is the belief that if we live perfect, look perfect and act perfect, we can minimise or avoid the pain of blame, judgment and shame.

“‘The quest for perfection is exhausting and unrelenting. We go through our lives trying to be who we think we’re supposed to be, doing and saying what we think people want to hear, putting on whatever mask we think we need.

‘We end up saying “Yes” a lot when we mean “No” and we end up saying “No” when we mean: “Yes, I really want to do that.” ’


What do you think? Should we give up trying to be the perfect mum?



I’m Mary Cummings, a ghostwriter, collaborator and all round word doctor. I help business owners write and publish business books; I'm also passionate about helping creative freelancers find work that they love - their work sweet spot with work on their terms, projects they love and clients who are a dream to work for.

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